


Barrel of a Gun

by jynx



Category: Iron Man (Comic), Iron Man - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Gen, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Tony Stark is his own warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-28
Updated: 2013-11-28
Packaged: 2018-01-02 20:54:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1061527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jynx/pseuds/jynx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony felt like he was staring down the barrel of a gun.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Barrel of a Gun

**Author's Note:**

> Written around the time of Dark Reign beginning

Tony felt like he was staring down the barrel of a gun. A loaded gun by the name of Johnny Walker Black Label. To avoid being indited and tried, and possibly thrown in the Negative Zone, he had agreed to be “chipped.” There was a kill-switch chip residing on the superficial skin of his heart, a tracking chip in his leg, and a permanent chip that rendered the Extremis null and void. There was also the large amount of blackmail he had slapped the Commission of Superhuman Activities and the President with that had kept him out.

Unfortunately, it didn't help the fact that he had lost his family, his home, everything. Once, he had lived in Stark Tower, or Avengers Tower, or whatever the hell anyone wanted to call it, had been able to look over the City and watch as it's denizens went about their lives when he felt disconnected from himself. Ironically, watching the City from the Tower had made him feel connected to everyone else, even seventy-three stories up. Now, he lived in an apartment in Boston; tiny, poorly constructed, and no where for him to build or conceptualize. He didn't even have his “toys” (as Steve had once referred to them as). 

To add insult to injury, Norman Osborn was nice enough to give him a stipend each month for his “upkeep.” Osborn was the one who had arranged and paid for his housing, his food, his clothes. He was Osborn's fucking kept man. He got less now than he had when he was living off his trust fund from his father, and even then that had been pathetic because his father had hated him.

It was still enough to buy a 1.75 liter bottle of Johnny Walker Black Label. It was enough for more than one, especially when the first one was already more than half gone. He had thought fighting Steve was the worst thing he could live through, but being kept might very well be worse.

Half of the first bottle stuck in his throat, made him feel like he was swallowing ground glass each time, and the only thing that eased it was the liquor. He hated himself more with each drink he took, but whether it was two fingers or half a bottle, he could never forget. The liquor would not make it easier to swallow, would not make food stay down. It only made things worse, but granted him but a few moments reprieve.

The rest of the bottle went down smoothly, and he reveled in the taste. Tony had missed it, had felt the phantom taste of it in his mouth every time he'd been around alcohol, been around anyone who was (or had been) drinking. Now, he could drink an entire 1.75 liter bottle of Johnny and not feel a thing; Extremis burned it out of his system too fast. That didn't mean, though, that he couldn't try like hell to get as drunk as humanly possible, to drown the thoughts from his head, to empty his mind...

He used to think that Steve would return, would live again as he had before; that he would come and rescue him from himself, as he had before... That hope was gone. He didn't care anymore; he drank, apologizing to Steve with each and every sip he took, but it didn't make him stop.

It only made him drink more. And so, as he stared down the bottle of Johnny Walker, he apologized to Steve, cocking back that gun before pulling the trigger, swallowing the contents of his shot in one gulp.

“Reload,” he whispered to the dark.


End file.
